Life with Phobia: Associations
Words I’ve always used to describe my relationship with fish:
Terror
Fear
Panic
Trauma
Disgusting/gross/sickening
In the last six months, but especially through EMDR I’ve started to associate fish with these words/descriptions:
Pathetic
Humiliation
Shame
Burden
Trapped
Unsafe (to be a fish is to be unsafe)
Powerlessness
Connection
Homeward (fish have an understanding of ‘home’)
Motherhood
Womb (womb experience as an aquatic being)
Undesirable
The second list feels like freedom compared to the first list; there’s understanding. I see the disowned parts of myself in fish. I see myself in fish.